There is a spot in Clare's baby book for a letter from both of her parents. (I can tell you now that Ben will probably NEVER fill in his page, other than to possibly say something like "Clare. I am your father.") I still haven't written anything, either, and I was thinking now would be a good time to write it. Now, before baby brother or sister arrives. The problem is deciding what to say.
Do I tell her how much I love her, and how that will never change, even once the baby comes? How I'll always be Clare's mommy?
Do I tell her how much I've enjoyed this past summer, the two of us hanging out, knowing that right now I am her best buddy?
Or that even though I know she prefers me over almost any other person right now (except maybe Daddy), I can already see this changing as she joins in with other kids playing at the park? How I am so glad it is changing, how proud I am to see her jump in and play with the other kids, because that's how it's supposed to be?
Do I tell her about some of her favorite things right now, how much she loves to play catch, go to the park, ride her tricycle, and read books?
Do I talk about how funny she is, how creative? How she is constantly inventing little games, and has started role playing?
Do I tell her how I'd like to just bottle every minute, because she is changing so fast? Or how the sound of her little voice coming from her room in the morning, singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star or Wheels on the Bus, just melts my heart, even if I am not ready to get up yet?
Do I tell her that I am really nervous about the baby coming, because I can't imagine loving anyone as much as I love her? And that I feel bad, that my attention will be divided, because I never want her to be unhappy? (Even though I know she will be, sometimes. And should be.)
Maybe I'll tell her all of this. Or maybe I'll wait, write the letter in a few years, when she is older and has become even more amazing than she already is.