Sunday, August 23, 2015

August Ennui

I've always wanted to use the word ennui in a piece of writing. Hey look, I've done it twice now!

It happens every year. I know others feel it too: that anxious feeling that starts to take hold in August. The days start getting noticeably shorter. Back to school preparation is in full swing. This year, the feeling set in for me when I saw mums for sale outside of the grocery store. Fall is just around the corner.

Now, I love fall, and am usually relieved for the change in season. I much prefer jeans to shorts. (I don't wear shorts.) Also, though, I feel sad. No more picnics or days at the pool. No more lazy mornings. I have very mixed emotions about Clare going to school five days a week. And, to quote from a popular show on HBO, winter is coming.

I often wonder if I would get this feeling if I lived in a warmer climate. Sure, there'd still be the change in routine that comes with school starting again, but maybe I wouldn't have the same sense of bleakness, of knowing the nice days are numbered.

Still, though, I am going to do my best to enjoy the rest of summer, and fall and winter for that matter.

On a summer-y note, we finished swimming lessons last week, and we made progress! Last year, Clare refused to go into the big pool at all, but this year she did it! Sure, it was just during the last two days of lessons. And one of the days it was 60 degrees and raining, so she realized she'd be much warmer in the pool than out of it, but still! Progress! Christopher passed into the next level, but unfortunately he will not be old enough to participate in that class next year. Which means I will be in the pool with him again. He had fun though, which I guess is the important thing.

At the beginning of summer, I was super strict about screen time and playing outside. If the weather was nice, the kids were not allowed to choose an indoor event. Now, I am tired of being an enforcer. I am tired of sunscreen. Even though I know the nice days won't last much longer, I let them go to the aquarium if they want to. Soon Clare won't be doing much of that kind of thing anyway. As Clare pointed out this morning, we are outside when we walk to and from the car. Can't argue with that kid's logic. Or her fashion sense.

Now, off to enjoy the last few weeks of summer.


  1. Yeah, I'm totally getting that panicky feeling of winter coming. It's like one second I'm excited to rake leaves into piles for them to jump in and then the next second I'm hyperventilating about being stuck inside all the time!

    I do think I'd feel different if we lived in San Diego or somewhere else. Because you wouldn't have those months were you just want to DIE. It would be much less of a extreme change.

    But we're not moving, so I should just get used to it by now!

  2. I love that goofy photo of Clare. She makes me smile. (Your curtain looks like a photo backdrop - which makes it even more funny to me. Let's call this the "winter in summer" photo shoot, because Mother Nature is extremely confused!)

    I try not to think too far ahead, which is probably a blessing and a curse all at the same time. (I don't feel panicky about what's to come, because I'm living in the moment, but I also don't always adequately plan for the future because I'm living in the moment).

    We just need to schedule lots of fun winter get-togethers this year!!