....and we're done!

I have nursed Clare for the last time. Not to be overly dramatic or anything.

It was hard emotionally. Not so much because I’ll miss nursing itself, but because my baby is not a baby anymore. She is a full-on toddler, complete with mad toddling skills.

I’ll also miss the closeness that comes with nursing. I have been forcing Clare to sit on my lap while she drinks her morning bottle. (Yes, bottle. I know, I know, she needs to be weaned off those too. I’ll get to it eventually.) She is usually fine with it, because she is like her Mom and takes about a half hour to fully wake up in the morning.

It has been a few weeks since that final feeding, and I think everything is back to normal body-wise for me. I’ve been really lucky with this whole process of nursing. We struggled a bit that first weekend, but after that it has been smooth sailing – with just a few hiccups here and there. I really didn’t get painfully engorged after weaning, either. Just slightly full for a few days, and a few minutes on the pump solved that problem.  I also took allergy medication regularly for a few days. I don’t know if it was that or just time, but I soon dropped two bra sizes.

Also, Clare hasn’t seemed to care at all about giving up nursing. Everyone said it, and it proved to be true: it was harder for me than it was for her. There have been a few times when she’s been sitting on my lap and takes it upon herself to look down my shirt and make the sign for milk, but I think that is more of an observation than a true desire.  She has taken a renewed interest in her pacifier, however. I let her have it when she is upset or tired. I don’t know. Is that bad? I see kids much older than her with pacifiers in their mouths, so I am not going to worry about it too much right now.

I don’t miss pumping. I don’t miss nursing bras. And I don’t miss having to regulate my alcohol intake. Hello, old friend.

I really don't drink that much, but it is nice to be able to have a glass of wine while cooking dinner if I feel like it.  

I do miss my little baby, and sometimes I still get a glimpse of her when she falls asleep while I am rocking with her. My toddler is so much fun, though, that I think I’ll be okay.

And she is just fine.

Ready for Hollywood.